When will it all end?

From the day you rejected me. That could be the last time you'll ever go out with me. You never know how I would actually feel. 你说你看到我的fb post 你觉得很 pek chek. What have I done wrong? I've only post something to express myself. You said we should just be friends. But now all I see is that you're just avoiding me like a plague. But that's alright, I wait.. I waited day after day.. It's only day four since you killed my emotions towards everything. Night after night I kept having nightmares.. I woke up in the middle of the night.. Having the worst fears that you might be taken from me. But that's already happened. That's just the first stage. If it continues to stage 2 I might as well end my miserable life. Why are you doing this to me?? That's alright. I never blamed you from the start. You were not to blame at all. Everything was my fault. I wish I could just laugh off all the things that I've done for you. After the day you threw everything back at me, you started feeling guilty. Why should you? I'm sorry if I've ever gave you any problems. If anyone were to ever read this. Don't blame her at all. It's just my own foolish and stubbornness. Day after day, the problems pile up. I tried finding people to talk to. But somehow they just got tired of me. That's ok, I won't go trouble you guys anymore. You all don't know what it's like to have a loser dad who doesn't even have a proper job and still feels proud about it. Or parent's that would understand you at all. It's hard you know, I wish I could just get hit by a truck or the sky would fall down and crush me... 我真的受不了....